a feeling of community

Cedarwood: The Oil of Community

"Cedarwood brings people together to experience the strength and value of community.  Those in need of Cedarwood struggle to form bonds within social groups.  This can often be due to overdeveloped sense of individuality.  Rather than allowing themselves to be supported by family, friends, or a community, they live be excessive self-reliance.  On the other hand, the individual's difficulty forming social roots may also stem from feeling disconnected and separate from the human family.  Cedarwood inspires the feeling of belonging and assists the heart in opening to receive the love and support of other people.  It invites the strong-willed individual to couple the strength of individuality with the supportive power of community."

- taken from Emotions and Essential Oils 2017 Sixth Edition

I read this and thought, "PERFECT!  I'm going to diffuse this in my classroom!  Those are the main targets of my lesson plans!  My children have those negative characteristics (struggle to form bonds within social groups) in their past and present.  We will be a COMMUNITY!!"  

Monday, I diffuse Cedarwood and Rosemary (the oil of knowledge and transition).  I diffuse it in our Meeting Area...I want to make sure we are building some community during our Morning Community Meeting!  Aaannnd....we fall apart.  One kid is annoyed at another sitting too close (and the best way he thought to handle that is to push).  Another is upset (and yelling loudly with profanity) because another will not cross her legs.  I try to start the meeting with a fun greeting to only be matched with two others screaming the greeting.  Once settled and trying to start a feeling check-in, one starts to yell, "It's not fair you asked (insert name) first."  This then upsets another who cannot tolerate yelling without going into fight mode.  I begin to think, "Maybe we have a bad case of the Mondays."

Tuesday morning, with the same oils in the diffuser, there are very similar reactions.  I am beginning to question what in the world is going on- granted the children are coping with extreme cases of doubt and insecurity from home and their diagnosis (Emotional Disturbance, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, etc.) warrant them these social struggles as well.  But, there is not normally two days in a row of such a severe case of fighting to get along.

Wednesday, I am not giving up.  I put Cedarwood and Rosemary in the diffuser again.  I also put Peace and Serenity in the other diffuser that is located on the other side of the room.  We had a much calmer Morning Meeting- a couple were absent, but kinder words were said and personal space was respected without numerous (10-12) reminders or redirections.  

I began to reflect....the Cedarwood oil creates a feeling of belonging and community.  Why would I expect that feeling to initially feel good to a person who struggles with trust, companionship, and regulating feelings?  I remind myself that the behaviors we see in other people are most times secondary behaviors.  They are the facade one puts on to cover the real feeling or thoughts that are going on inside one's self.  The uncomfortableness of community and openness is something that can feel very scary initially.  The first reaction to the uncomfortable was to react with something that felt comfortable- fight, yell, create chaos.  

Thursday I decided that we needed time to process the feelings of community and belonging and definitely NOT GIVE UP.  I diffused Cedarwood and Rosemary again in our Meeting Area.  Our Morning Community Meeting was much more calm.  There were upsets and annoyances, but they were handled with respect and understanding.  We successfully practiced one of the class expectations they set for the class: be friends with love, care, and working together with kindness!  Success!

Sometimes a feeling (good or bad) really has to settle in and process through our minds and bodies before the positive of it can shine, feel good, and spread throughout the world.